Tag Archives: Porch

A Rainy Tuesday: Ultrasound And More โ˜”๐ŸŒ

Iโ€™m not dying of breast cancer!


So, context. You may remember I started having breast ultrasounds a year and a half ago because my doctor found a lump. That was scary. So it turned out, my breast tissue is kinda fucked up, though it’s not exactly abnormal. I have several cysts.

This isn’t uncommon, but not super normal either. One particular cyst/mass was a bit different and all the ultrasounds are to monitor it multiple times a year for two years. So far so good –today was my third. But today I was very scared.

The reason is that two months ago I began having localized pain in one of my breasts. On a very specific spot. It was bothersome and scary. I was prepared to need at a minimum a biopsy… turns out an old cyst decided to start shrinking, and that’s been causing the annoyance.

When I was told all was good today, they told me it’d been two years and I needed no more tests until 40. So when, 15 minutes later, I got a phone call telling me the doctor wanted me to return in six months, I was apprehensive.

Turns out they’d just miscalculated, and it’ll be two years in six months. So basically that’s my boob story. I’m kind of acclimated to the idea of getting some sort of cancer because I think that’s more common the longer humans manage to live. ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™€๏ธ So I’m careful and prepared.

(I say coolly, after pissing my pants in fear for days)

๐Ÿฑ Kitty Ramble ๐Ÿฑ

Look into the void and despair:

She was crying at me because I was leaving the house to go for my ultrasound.

I post a lot about Tomoyo (even though my favorite, my โ€œheart catโ€ is my little Rosie) because Tomoyo is the worst cat Iโ€™ve ever had, in many ways. Her health is, to put it in plain terms, generally “not great”. She almost died as a kitten, I nursed her through a particularly terrible night, lying her on my chest trying to keep her fever managed. She has asthma, and when I call her neurotic I mean that in a clinical, not in a funny way.

She has many destructive compulsions. She is very high strung, almost feral, and responded poorly to the many anxiety meds we tried. Add to her health issues (physical and mental) the fact that giving any medication to this cat is a terrible ordeal. You name it, we’ve tried it. It often ends in blood (ours) and Tomoyo’s emotional distress.

Often, decisions need to be made with our vet in regards to what meds to give and if any, along with how much to feed her (leading to her weight gain) had to be balanced with her behavior: this medicine may improve her life, but is the distress worth it? If we fed her less, she would be healthier, but so destructive that she would have had to be rehomed or put down. They are one and the same, by the way. I’m sure if I tried to rehome her, another person would put her down for serious behavioral issues. And I’ll never allow that to happen. Not unless she’s viciously attacking me, the other cats or herself.

In many ways Tomoyo has made our lives worse and more stressful. My response to this has been to shower her with love. If rehoming her meant SHE can be happier, some of her problems better managed, Iโ€™m sure I would. BUTโ€ฆ โ€ฆit doesnโ€™t. I doubt anyone else would put the time, money and patience we have put into this cat. She wonโ€™t even cuddle with you. I think anyone else might put her down. So Iโ€™ll never let her go.

I hold onto the good moments instead. Such as, after using the inhaler for a few weeks โ€”an experience that invariable ended with me bleeding and Tomoyo hiding for hoursโ€” one day she realized it helped. Now she takes deep breaths and purrs while I do it. (Though she still fights when I grab her to do this, and screams, and scratches me with her back legsโ€ฆ you have to realize this is a mild reaction for Tomoyo. That would give some idea of what a bad reaction might be.)

When she began to relax during the inhaler procedure I could have cried. When she began to fall asleep by my computer, belly-up (this cat that never feels safe enough to relax in that way) I could have, too.

I know I have to love Tomoyo on her own terms. I do my best for her. My closeness with her is directly connected to how difficult she is. But she is also a very loving cat…

Also, a chonky, neurotic, asthmatic devil incarnate.

The interruption in petting prompted an audible sigh and loud, dog-like โ€œHUFFโ€

At one point today, she saw her own butt as she left the desk corner. There is a camera pointed behind my monitor where she sleeps. I like watching her while I work. Well, she FREAKED. She thought she saw another cat (and, well, she did!) but by the time she approached the screen, the other black cat was mysteriously “gone”… lol ๐Ÿ˜…

๐ŸŒˆ Bonus Kotoko ๐ŸŒˆ

The old lady surprises us sometimes by climbing the cat tree.

After the relief of my ultrasound, I went to Dollar Tree and Five Below. I got some more things for the upcoming sleepover with my friend Shelly, some more stuff for scrapbooking, and other odds and ends.

While I was at the store Christopher messaged me so I could pick my goodies from the Dinosaur World gift shop (he’s currently at NATIA and managed to get away to do me that huge favor, since going to Dinosaur World is something that I don’t expect to happen again for years). I can’t wait to show those things off when he’s back! He got me a velociraptor lamp and a framed holographic picture.

At Five Below I spotted a wild smol-spots:

I always, always treat myself after a scary ultrasound (or blood draw/shot). For my goodies I got some Lisa Frank stickers, some animal/critter “mood” stickers, cute bird and birthday stickers, an InuYasha keychain I’ll turn into a necklace, more crayons, three mini Jurassic Park baby dinos and two greeting cards plus a pack of Alphabet flash cards with Sesame Street characters, for scrapbooking. ๐Ÿ˜Š

I got two more really big coloring books for the sleepover –I guess we have quite enough now, but I won’t post those so I can surprise my friend in case she sees this post. ๐Ÿ˜

In the afternoon I finished pressure washing the porch and putting everything back outside. I had to pressure wash the porch while it rained. Because I had all the porch stuff inside and need to clean the house tomorrow, I just had to finish today, there was no way around it. It wasn’t super fun, but it is done now.

I had a wee dinner, but it filled me up. Three little sandwiches and some baked kale chips.

I didn’t get to scrapbook today, but it was an extremely accomplished day all the same. It’s actually been a string of very fruitful days. I also just completed the daily warm-up as I wrap up this post. Time to get ready for bed. Goodnight, everyone!

A Relaxing Weekend ๐ŸŒท๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒผ

Despite being so busy, and a hiccup here and there, I think we really had a good weekend. Yesterday we played cards and did rebus puzzles. And I’ve gotten so much done in terms of exercise, commissions, and housework too. ๐Ÿ˜Š

The dishwasher broke down today. Well, it broke down a while ago, and wasn’t drying the dishes. Opening it up, and doing research, Christopher found the issues and came to the conclusion that we’ve reached a point where a fix does not make economic sense (this dishwasher has been fixed a few times by him) so, a new dishwasher it is.

We got super lucky, and managed to snag one for delivery tomorrow. With the upcoming party, we really needed it.

My t-rex Patriotic garden flag came in!

Here it is, installed:

With Christopher’s blessing, I also put this by the front window:

Unfortunately things have become such that overt displays of patriotism can cause people to assume that we hold a certain political leaning/viewpoints that we strongly disagree with. ๐Ÿ˜ฅ So I wanted to make it clear where we stand, regardless of all the USA flags.

That aside, I’ve been working on making the back porch prettier. The little gnome girl was a present from my mom:

I had one of these today while working on commissions, they’re pretty cute:

For dinner, Christopher obliged my rather selfish request and made me absolutely fantastic teriyaki turkey meatballs with rice (I think it was teriyaki, anyway… I made the rice, to help.) It was a great dinner!

Tomorrow I’ll be up at 6:30am again. Lots ‘n lots to do… ๐Ÿ๐Ÿ’ฆ

A Brand New Year ๐Ÿฅ‚

Happy New Year, everyone! We had a few friends over last night, not many, just people who were part of our “bubble” already. And I guess we are all getting old because after ringing the new year we all said our good nights. But was it ever lovely.

It was the first New Year’s Eve in a few years that I felt like things are going to be okay again, our little friend group can just remake itself and we can keep enjoying each other’s company, and I can do that without thinking so much of the past. I was so happy.

I also learned more about my friends, things I didn’t know that help me understand them better.

I had a pretty busy New Year’s Eve… day. I finished another commission, prepared a lot of stuff in case several people wanted to spend the night (in the end, no one did, but I had to be ready). Moved more posts from Instagram over to my blog, cleaned… cleaned lots. Repotted one of my plants. Sold a few more commission slots. I also went around adding a bit more decor here and there, just making the house a little nicer, particularly the porch:

Then I got dressed. I tried to dress a bit classier for the evening.

I wore the fancy silver bracelet that Grandma sent me for Christmas:

Tomorrow, my blog will go back to normal. And starting today, I’m changing my eating habits. Not a diet. I’m just going back to my old way of eating, the way I abandoned when COVID hit. Well, I’d started already, but I’m going to try even harder, now. I hope you all enjoy the start of this new year!

All Done… โœจ

I finished with the porch. It was about 12 hours of work over two days. It really can only be called a “passable” job even though the pressure washer was amazing and I really did my very best. I pushed myself as much as I could with my cramps but honestly, I don’t think I could have done better if I didn’t have them. I really, really tried my hardest.

Compared to how it used to look it’s certainly a huge improvement, but to have the result of so much effort not be the perfection that was accomplished last time is a real letdown. At least I won’t be ashamed to have Grandma spend time in the porch now, though.

When my two other roman snails passed away, I was losing so many snails to the mite infestation, that I couldn’t mentally deal with burying them. This little guy gets a better send-off. I have an elephant bush cutting I am currently prepping for propagation. I’ll put it in the pot with him, in about two days. Goodbye, slimy pal. Thanks for the smiles.

Charlie Bear Cuddle Time was “eh”. Which is good. I didn’t need to want any more bears. I spotted Tootles in the background, and that was exciting, though. ๐Ÿฆ”

Nothing else to add… I am now trying to catch up on chores. I am so exhausted. I didn’t even plan dinner. I feel pretty accomplished otherwise, but I can barely think straight.

I just hope Christopher is in a mood to look after me a little. ๐Ÿฅบ

Cleaning Up The Porch ๐Ÿงผ

We finally picked up our new pressure washer. For the price, it’s incredible! I had used a gas-powered pressure washer before. It was really loud, powerful, and strong-smelling. I thought an electric pressure washer would be nowhere near as strong, or loud. But I’d say it’s just about as loud (only, it’s only loud when you squeeze the trigger, and there is no need to prime it) and, far as as cleaning power, it’s just as good:

As I’d mentioned… the porch was NASTY:

It was so bad, that I only managed to do half yesterday. And as soon as I’m done writing this, I’ll go and do the other half. So the elf update and everything else will be in the afternoon.

I hope everyone has a nice day!